“Pool”-side Manner (How NOT to pick up girls at the pool)


Dear Provo Homie,

Reports show that on any given day, you can find at least 370 dude-bros congregating at the Kingdom (King Henry/Belmont collective) to pick up on the same woman.

One girl shared this story of being approached at said location.

She states:

“So, I’m at the pool, talking to a friend, tanning, having a gay old time, and I meet this guy.

He is tall, great smile. Overall, a reasonably good looking dude.

And he starts to chat with me.

Which I’m pretty open to, until he refers to me as a hoe. 

Like, in the first 30 seconds!

Strike one.

I try to brush it off, and he continues like it’s no big deal.

Except he just keeps making more rude and derogatory comments towards me.

Strike 2.

Naturally, I asked if he is actually this conversationally inept or if he’s having some kind of mental break.

His reply: ‘I just know what’s up. Treat a girl like dirt, and she’ll stick like mud.’


Strike 3.

On a scale of 1-10 on the socially acceptable scale, we at Provo Chronicles rate this interaction at a solid Gob Bluth.

If you have your own horror or success stories, send them in an email or leave a comment!

Thanks for reading, and happy dating.


PS. Don’t forget to share your own stories via email! Or leave them in a comment. Visual aids always help. With your help, I know we can make Provo Dating Great Again!


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