Hold My Tissue


Hello Reader,

Today is a good day.

Do you know why?

Well, because I have a really good story for you.

It starts where all real romances do…at FHE.

There was a girl, Summer.

And a boy, Tom.

They met and hit it off.


It was like, there was a real purpose for YSA FHE.

After talking for a while, the two decide to take a walk and get to know each other more.

As the night starts to get later, she says that it’s time for her to go home, so he seizes his chance and asks her out for the coming Saturday. Ahhhh. J’amour.

It’s like Julie finding Wally Kestler. If you don’t know who they are, ARE YOU EVEN MORMON? Jk. It’s from Saturday’s Warrior. (Which I used to totally love as a kid…CLASSIC.)

Anyways, the first few days started out well enough between the two new love birds. But then he started ignoring the 3 point rule, and it made Summer UNEASY.

Tom would text her 4-9 texts and 3 phone calls to every response. And not like, “hey I’m going to break up my thoughts in a slightly annoying yet still charming way and send 12 texts to get across one message,” but like:



“Hey how’s it going?”

“Hey what are you doing??”

Phone call

“Yo, I’m just working..”

Phone call

Etc., etc..

So Summer started to dread her date. Unfortunately, Summer is not a person that deals well with clingy-ness. She tends to shy away from that.

But the week moves along and Saturday arrives.

It has been determined that the two were going to go up to a Zombie Walk (about a 40 minute drive.) He says that he will arrive at 2. He showed up about 4:15. The Zombie Walk had begun at 4…

The two start driving, but not before a “pre-date prayer.”

**Listen, I personally love prayer. Probably my favorite thing besides Jesus, but on a first date, NOT OVER THE FOOD?! Smh**

Then he tries to hold her hand whilst driving. (At least we know why he needed to pray beforehand.)

Summer tells him that she doesn’t really want to hold his hand because she doesn’t really know him.




They ended up missing the Zombie Walk and having, instead, the LONGEST date Summer had ever been on. It included a total lack of commonality, personality, and direction. Literally. They got lost 4 times.

After a myriad of other, unfortunate events (one might even relate it to that one Lemony Snicket series,) the date finally comes to a close. He walks her to the door, as any true gentleman would, and informs her that he is excited to go out again.

Flattered by his intentions, but slightly repulsed by his presumptuousness, she politely declines.

Which he doesn’t understand, and takes her to flat out telling him that she just doesn’t like him to allow her enough of a pause to run into her house. At last! The end!

Only it wasn’t.

5 minutes later, Tom is back, pleading to speak with Summer.

She opts to talk to him in his car, because upon her own mother opening the door and inviting him inside, he curtly brushes her off and demands privacy. Off put by his behavior towards her beloved mother, THE WOMAN WHO GAVE HER LIFE, (and just about the worst date that Summer had ever been on,) she tells him just how uninterested she is.

That sent him off on all the reasons that she needed to give him another chance, and why she was being selfish by not going out with him again.

Summer was getting all fired up and ready to respond, when he did something entirely unexpected.

He got quiet.


“You know {Summer,} in a relationship, you need to consider both people’s feelings.”



This is not a joke.

Summer, taken off guard, and unsure how to respond to this uncomfortable turn of events, got out of the car and went back into her house without another word…He then proceeded to stalk her for the next month and yell at her whenever they were both in the same vicinity at church.

Which Summer thought was mildly inappropriate, but what are you going to do when you have already “broken up” with your NOT BOYFRIEND??

They probably got married and have 12 kids by now.


PS. Have your own horror story? Success story? Maybe this same thing happened to you and it TOTALLY worked out! The people of Provo want to know. And The Provo Chronicles wants to tell them. Send an email or a comment and we’ll publish your own story!


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