YOU’RE MAKING THIS SO MUCH HARDER THAN IT NEEDS TO BE
This last week, we celebrated Valentine’s Day. Ah. The day of love. Quel vie manifique. What a great country that we live in that we have a holiday dedicated to love. God bless America.
Now if you’re reading this blog, chances are that you did NOT have a Valentine. Or maybe you did and after that date you’re single again. It happens to the best of us.
So, what can you do?
You can stop overthinking it.
On Sunday, the teacher got up and was delivering a lovely lesson about having faith in timing. During which time, he recanted a story about when he met a girl. He talked to her for a while, and before leaving her, he took her face in his hands, and told her that he was going to marry her.
Now you’re probably thinking #classicUtah, but GUFFAW, IT HAPPENED IN EUROPE. (But we all know that Mormons like to move fast on that whole thing. That’s universal. In the United States.)
Anyways, back to the love birds–over the next couple of years, this nice young man diligently kept in contact with his Swedish dame, writing her every day. He even recorded himself singing classic songs, so she could more easily learn English. “Judge not that ye be not judged…”
All the while, she is dating everyone else. Apparently she had 5 boyfriends. But that did NOT deter our young hero.
At one point, he and his parents fasted alternately for 6 weeks until one day she showed up on his doorstep and announced that she was ready to marry him.
They have been married for over 30-ish years now.
And that, friends, is how you do it.
Basically, if you’re playing games, over analyzing every text, and reading into perceived gesture, whatever it is the kids do–essentially just being a huge DERP–you’re doing it wrong.
Dating is not as hard as we make it.
So why do we make it so hard?
Rather than spending time planning all the ways we can outsmart the other person, trying to keep the ball in your court, so to say, just take a chance. Ask the girl. Call the guy. Love is about taking risks and jumping in headfirst.
Elder Holland says:
“No serious courtship or engagement or marriage is worth the name if we do not fully invest all that we have in it and in so doing trust ourselves totally to the one we love. You cannot succeed in love if you keep one foot out on the bank for safety’s sake. The very nature of the endeavor requires that you hold on to each other as tightly as you can and jump in the pool together. In that spirit, and in the spirit of Mormon’s plea for pure love, I want to impress upon you the vulnerability and delicacy of your partner’s future as it is placed in your hands for safekeeping—male and female, it works both ways.”
You’ve got to stop being afraid of all the things that can go wrong, and think of all the things that can go right. So uncomplicate the process and just go for it.
Even if it’s just been one conversation, if you feel it, grab her by the face and propose, DANGIT. It may backfire and worst case scenario, she thinks you’re nuts. Well, either she likes the crazies, or she’s not the one you’re going to marry. You will get married. Trusting in the Lord means having faith in His timing.
Happy loving everybody.
PS. If you have your own thoughts on the subject, or your own stories to add, leave a comment or shoot an email. Stories are what keep us going, right?